This week on Ohio Valley Wrestling, what will be the fallout of last week’s bitter no-contest between Dustin Jackson and Tony Bizo? Rumour has it that the National Heavyweight Champion, Jesse Godderz, is in the building. What will he have to say about all these men clamoring after his title?
There’s no time to waste, so let’s head straight to the ring!
‘The Iron Lion’ Tom Coffey vs. Kal Herro
Just one week from being assaulted once more by Tony Gunn and having his fanny pack taken from him, Kal Herro found himself up against the super-heavyweight Tom Coffey—who has he upset in the back to get this duty? No one of course; he’s getting a push, but it looks like they’re beating him down so as to build him up again.
Case in point: Herro started by trying to take Coffey’s leg, to which Coffey responded by swatting Kal away like a fly. He then trapped Kal in a bear hug before squashing him in the corner. Kal attempted a comeback, nailing Coffey with a springboard bulldog, but a double axe handle attempt from the top saw Herro caught and squashed with a massive belly-to-belly suplex for the 1-2-3.
He’s just not having any luck, is he? Except…on Overdrive, Tony Gunn accepted one last challenge from Kal Herro—if Kal put his boots on the line! The implication being Kal will have to quit because he won’t have any boots anymore. I mean, he could always buy some new ones, but that’s not the point, I guess…joking aside, I’m very much enjoying where this story is going.
Afterward, we got a video for a new masked wrestler calling himself Captain Caribbean, who told everyone he’s coming to OVW to make “big waves.” I do enjoy a good pun! I think I’ve seen those tattoos somewhere before though…
“A Strawberry Cheesecake That Had an Affair With a Leopard”
Backstage, Stephanie was trying to get a word from Ryan Howe, who told her that he’d never held the National Heavyweight title and that it was the one title he hadn’t held in OVW. He was feeling confident, but Luscious Lawrence wasn’t having any of that. He told Howe that he was going to be the face of OVW, not Howe. This brought in AJZ, who labeled Ryan Howe a “wannabe rock god” and Lawrence, quite brilliantly, “a strawberry cheesecake that had an affair with a leopard!”
As the three continued arguing, Stephanie made her escape. I don’t blame her, somehow…
Cash Flo (w/ Josh Ashcraft) vs. Kyle Hawk
The crowd didn’t initially know what to make of Kyle Hawk, as he made his way to the ring in silence, but as soon as he started to stomp around the ring in a tribal dance, the crowd seemed to get fired up; a fire Flo quickly extinguished by kicking Hawk right in the face.
Flo bullied the smaller man around the ring with big strikes. Haw tried to fight back with a big kick to the face and by tricking Flo into falling through the ropes to the floor, but Cash made Hawk regret that by smashing him down to the floor with a massive chop.
Back in the ring, Cash Flo picked Hawk up onto his shoulder and danced around with him in a mockery of Hawk’s tribal dance. Hawk backed Flo into the corner for a series of stiff chops but Flo dropped Hawk twice with big slams before near-crushing the guy with a big frog splash from the top for the win.
Afterward, Flo added insult to injury by stuffing some dollar bills into Hawk’s mouth. He has to admit though, they taste better than those massive kicks!
Scarface Always Loses
Reverend Ronnie Roberts was back with The Good Word (and a plea to fill his collection plate next week with Easter chocolate). His guest this week was a frustrated Tony Bizo, who disputed that the match with Dustin Jackson was thrown out and that he was the real winner. Jackson came out and said he was a man of the people and everybody knows that the match was thrown out. Not only that, he said, referring to the cut Bizo received last week, “Scarface always loses!”
That was enough for Bizo to lose his temper and attack, as the two men went at it with a flurry of fists. Reverend Ronnie made the sensible decision to get his collection plate to safety as officials scurried around trying to separate the two. They succeeded for a moment…that is until Jackson continued the assault on the ramp!
Scarface might always lose, but with a rematch set for the main event, the audience were definitely the real winners here.
‘The Suplex Shogun’ Jackson Stone vs. Mahabali Shera
Jackson Stone rocks a kind of Kabuki gimmick with a focus on suplexes, which is a cool combination. This is his OVW debut and he’s up against Shera. No pressure then…
Actually, this was an interesting battle of strategy. Stone was able to wear down Shera with strikes to set him up for a suplex but then wouldn’t be able to follow through as Shera would be too strong to be lifted. So, was the focus on suplexes harming Stone’s chance of victory? And what could he switch to when suplexes were the main bulk of his game?
As it happens, Stone was able to nail Shera in the end with a big T-Bone suplex, Taz-style. But it didn’t have the desired effect; in fact, it only seemed to make Shera mad. One sit-down powerbomb later, Shera was victorious once more.
I don’t know who is finally going to be able to put Shera down, but I do know I want to see more of Stone. I’ve always been a sucker for suplexes and the Kabuki gimmick is cool. Good stuff!
OVW Women’s Champion Hollyhood Haley J (w/ Luscious Lawrence) vs. ‘Queenpin’ Katalina Perez
Another OVW debut here, as Katalina Perez stepped in the ring for the non-title bout with Haley J. Perez took to ‘Hollyhood’ straight from the start, smashing her face into the mat and hitting a swinging neck breaker. Haley J returned fire with a superkick before the two women started to exchange chops. Haley J cut Perez off with some hard chops to the throat before landing Heels From The Hood. Rather than go for the pin, Haley insulted her opponent. Big mistake. Perez battered the champ with some big forearms before sending Haley into the ropes face-first, tripping her up and hitting a short DDT for what looked to be the upset victory.
At which point, Luscious Lawrence jumped up on the apron as Haley J backed up into the corner. When Perez went back to deal with Haley, the champ pulled Perez by the tights so she smashed her head into the second turnbuckle, then applied a modified choke for the win by stoppage.
That was easily the best Haley J match I’ve seen since I’ve started reviewing OVW. Short and sweet and a lot of fun.
Dustin Jackson vs. Tony Bizo
To right the no-contest of last week, Jackson and Bizo were set to face each other one more time to determine who the fourth man would be in the ladder match to be the number one contender to Jesse Godderz’s National Championship. And speaking of the devil, here was Godderz himself to join commentary for this match. Was somebody about to be screwed? As it happens, there was interference, but Godderz kept himself to himself—this time.
Both men started hot and heavy with some big fists as Jesse Godderz commented on Bryan Kennison’s supposedly questionable body odor. Don’t worry Bryan, we don’t believe him. Jackson took it up a notch with some fast-paced moves but Bizo moved out of the way when Jackson looked to make the big dive to the floor.
Back in the ring, Bizo ducked another dive from the top by Jackson and basically charged at him, knocking him down. Not pretty but sure effective! Bizo rained down blows on Jackson before sending him into the corner and taking his head off with a big superkick, followed by a Rock Bottom. As Jesse Godderz explained that he doesn’t care who wins as long as both men hurt themselves, Adam Swayze came out to distract the ref as Rex slid in and crushed Bizo with a big slam as punishment for his shenanigans last week.
Dustin tried to capitalize with a neck breaker but Drew Hernandez came out and pulled Bizo out of the ring. As Jackson argued with Drew, Bizo took advantage and sent Jackson straight into the ring post. It was all to no avail though, as back in the ring, Jackson managed to surprise Bizo with a sunset flip to get the decisive 1-2-3 on Bizo and book his spot in the ladder match.
Bizo was furious but Jackson had other concerns. He pointed over at Jesse Godderz and made a belt gesture around his waist. You might want to start preparing yourself, Mr. Godderz. These men are hungry for your gold!
This was another great episode of OVW. We had two impressive debuts in Jackson Stone and Katalina Perez and I really hope we see more of them on the show. The feud between Kal Herro and Tony Gunn has seen the stakes be raised to serious levels. Omar Amir is doing his best ‘Midnight Rider’ impression and will no doubt frustrate LOB in the coming weeks. Contenership for the National Heavyweight championship is heating up. The four men competing in the ladder match have finally been decided and Jesse Godderz is clearly checking out his competition.
It’s exciting times for OVW as they really seem to be raising their game at their moment. Make sure you’re not missing out.